I Can't Stop Skattershooting
Skattershooting again . . . .
Has anyone else noticed the small cemetery about
five miles this side of Denton on the north side of highway 380? It looks
like a heck of a lot different than the typical Judeo-Christian cemetery.
I get this weird feeling that when somebody dies of that particular
faith (whatever that might be), they are immediately taken there and buried.
Back during the "Chinese Crisis", the US released
photos of the downed pilot of China when he previously was hot-dogging
around one of our planes. I was very confused to see the Chinese plane
have the english numerals "81192" on the side of it. Shouldn't that have
been written in Chinese?
Earlier this year, Texas A&M fullback Ja'Mar
Toombs decided to forego his senior year of eligibility and declared himself
eligible for the NFL draft. Well, the draft came and went this month and
Toombs was passed over by every single team.
Speaking of the draft, did you know that the second
round pick of the Cowboys, Quincy Carter, threw five (count 'em, five)
interceptions last year against South Carolina?
So Hollywood released the movie "Josie and the
Pussycats" this month. Someone want to explain to me why they wanted to
make a movie about a cartoon that no one ever watched?
I am intimidated by the menu at Starbucks.
Here's a question: When a guardrail along an interstate
is damaged, why does the highway department immediately put up signs that
say "Guardrail Damage Ahead"? What am I supposed to do when I see the warning?
There is no greater spokesperson against the War
on Drugs than New Mexico Governor Gary Johnson.
Speaking of the failed War on Drugs, are any of
you far right wingers disturbed by the shooting death of the seven month
old baby of a missionary in Peru? "The
Peruvian air force mistook the small aircraft for a drug plane and opened
fire. It was acting on information from a U.S. surveillance plane, whose
crew was contracted by the Central Intelligence Agency".
"Blow", by the way, was a pretty good movie.
If I told you that a robotic, unmanned airplane
was able to cross the Pacific Ocean for the first time, (1) when would
you guess it occurred, and (2) how newsworthy would it be? Answer: (1)
It happened this month, and (2) the Dallas Morning News reported it in
a one paragraph story on p. 7A of its April 24, 2001 edition.
I wonder what the salary is of MADD spokesperson
The Texas House of Representatives voted in favor
of the ridiculous "hate crimes" legislation the other day. Talk about partisan
politics: Democrats in the House were in favor of it 77-0 while Republican
opposed it 10-60. And the press simply reports that the bill passed "87-60".
Fourteen years ago, fresh out of law school, my
secretary asked me if I wanted free Dallas Mavericks tickets. Incredibly,
it was to Game Three of the conference finals against the L.A. Lakers.
Little did I know the significance of who I was watching: Rolando Blackman,
Mark Aguirre, Roy Tarpley, Derrick Harper, Sam Perkins, Detleff Schremph,
Magic Johnson, Byron Scott, James Worthy, A.C. Green, and Kareem
Isn't it a bid odd that Magic Johnson was diagnosed
as HIV Positive about ten years ago and now he's doing Coors commercials?
The guy that created www.wife-beaters.com
is nothing more than a salesman looking for free publicity. Nevertheless,
the media is going wacky over the guy.
I'm certainly a fan of free speech, but I'm not
real fond of Molly Ivins referring to the President as "Dubya" nor am I
particularly pleased with Blackie "Remember the Good Old Days" Sherrod's
reference to Troy Aikman as "Troy Boy".
This sentence comes from a review in the Dallas
Morning News about the Paul Simon concert the other night at
the Smirnoff Music Centre: "Mr. Simon and his 11-man multiethnic band .
. . are one of the greatest dance bands in rock today." Huh? Dance
"Neither in French nor in English nor in Mexican"
- President Bush on not taking questions at a photo-op with Canadian Prime
Minister Jean Chrestien. (Newsweek p. 23, 4/30/01)
Did you know that we have not had a U.S. Attorney
for the Northern District of Texas since January when Paul Coggins resigned?
From the "Department of Can't Get Enough Publicity
So I'll Make Some": Garth Brooks allegedly offered
a portion of his liver to Chris LeDoux who needed a new one last fall.
I hate the guy so much I can't stand it.
Mark Cuban is known for his hard work and hard
play. Did you see that during a post game interview after the Mavs first
game playoff loss to Utah that his nose started bleeding?
The U.S. Supreme Court recently OK'd the amazing
practice of police arresting folks for Class C misdemeanors. The Texas
Legislature had already allowed police officers to arrest citizens for
all Class C violations with the exception of speeding and, get this, having
an open container of alcohol.
There is a new commercial on TV depicting a teacher
who has the new "invisible braces". Why does she need braces? She has the
straightest teeth in the Southwest Proper.
David Letterman is not funny. My theory: If you
stand in front of a crowd night after night that is willing to howl
with laughter no matter what you say, you will eventually lose touch with
what makes the common man laugh.
I rarely watch Ally McBeal anymore but
I was impressed with tonight's episode that included Robert "I'm Going
to Jail" Downey, Jr; Paul "Pee Wee Herman" Rubens; and Sting. Not bad at
The Texas Legislature is trying to do away with
the popular election of appellate judges (you know, those names on the
ballot that are soooooo familiar to you) with a process that involves gubernatorial
appointments. Thought you would want to know that two of the worst legislators
voted against the measure: Jane Nelson and Florence Shaperio.
Why shouldn't eight-liners and other video gambling
games be legal? If a person wishes to throw away his own money, so be it.
Should government tell him he can't?
President Bush, on Good Morning America,
said that the US would back Taiwan if it were attacked by China. Prior
to that moment, the US had an intentionally "ambiguous policy" on the matter.
This policy would encourage Taiwan not to declare its independence (since
it would not know that we back it up) and, if it did, would not encourage
China to attack (since it couldn't be sure we wouldn't defend Taiwan).
Up until the other day, I had no idea such a policy existed. I have a sneaking
suspicion that President Bush didn't either.
As of today, no Texas Ranger starting pitcher
has an ERA less that 6.33.
Everytime you see a news report of a video camera
being used to catch a speeder or red light violator, it is a bunch of bull.
You are not responsible if your car commits a traffic violation.
You are responsible if you commit such a violation. However, proof
of your car going through an intersection is no proof that you were driving
it at the time.
Barry Green served as District
Attorney for Wise and Jack Counties from 1993 through 2000. He is now a
partner in the Decatur law firm of Smith
& Green, P.C.
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