Wise County on the Web

A tongue in cheek review of the news published this week regarding Wise County.
Normally posted every Sunday around 10:00 p.m.
(Note: To make sure you are receiving the most recent update, hold down the "Shift" key while you click on reload/refresh).
For the week ending 3/13/03:

The Story	Former police officer Shane Hale takes a plea bargain offer of 40 years for sexual assault of his daughter.
News worthiness (on a scale of 0 to 5)	********
The Spin	Prosecutor's Spin: "We're always happy when we don't have to put a six year old girl on the stand." Victim's Mother's Spin: "I don't think it's right. I think he should have to face my daughter."

The Story	Elected officials in Austin take measures to stop the sale of Wise County Park by the Texas Parks and Wildlife Commission.
News worthiness	*******
The Spin	Collectors of discarded aluminum cans feared a significant drop off in annual income if the sale had gone through. "Heck, next to the Texas Motor Speedway, that's my favorite place to get out the old metal detector. "

The Story	After purchasing the old Post Office to use as headquarters for the Decatur Police Department, the city council is now having reservations concerning the projected cost of $800,000 to remodel it due to "historical restrictions".
News worthiness	**
The Spin	Police objected to using the facility "as is" claiming the post office boxes weren't sufficient size for practical use. "We tried to use them as lockers but it took about forty-five of them per officer. Some of our boys have such big feet that even their shoes wouldn't fit in there," said an anonymous and fictitious source.

The Story	A new tanning salon expects to open up in Decatur on April 1, 2003. The name: "Toast Yur Bunz".
News worthiness	**
The Spin	*We are not making this up. Reference: Messenger, Saturday edition, p. 7A.*

The Story	Over 500 Northwest High School students "fight hunger" by going without food for 30 hours.
News worthiness	*
The Spin	Some claimed that it was a tougher battle than they expected due to something called "the munchies".

The Story	Devon Energy hands over a check for $116,000 for violating the city's drilling ordinance at six drill sites. The council met Thursday night on how to spend the settlement.
News worthiness	**
The Spin	The proposition that Wise Liquors cater this year's Christmas Party was defeated by a narrow margin.

See something in the local papers that struck you funny? Then suggest a topic for The Spin.

View Last week's issue.