Wise County on the Web

A tongue in cheek review of the news published this week regarding Wise County.
Normally posted every Sunday around 6:00 p.m.
(Note: To make sure you are receiving the most recent update, hold down the "Shift" key while you click on reload/refresh).
For the week ending 6/30/01:

The Story	The County Jail is projected to soon run over its current capacity of 120 beds.
News worthiness (on a scale of 0 to 5)	**
The Spin	Perhaps county officials should consider implementing a "time out" system in lieu of incarceration.

The Story	Citizens of New Fairview squabble over zoning. Owners of trailer homes were once again chastised in that "the city will not enforce ordinances that would require the manufactured homeowners to keep their properties clean and orderly".
News worthiness	*******
The Spin	*Ah, yes, Trailer Wars - The Unsightly Menace* returns.**

The Story	In a joint meeting between the Decatur City Council and the Decatur School Board, the Mayor Pro-Tem criticized all but one of the school board members for failing to attend the grand opening of the new Decatur Civic Center.
News worthiness	**
The Spin	Any chance any of the school board members were thinking, "We put up with so much crap on a daily basis, can we at least not catch some more here?"

The Story	After months of bickering, the Runaway Bay City Council finally names the new city park as "The Park at Runaway Bay" presumably copying the name of the home of the Texas Rangers.
News worthiness	*
The Spin	The "The Park at Runaway Bay" has a definite country twang to it since the Rangers play ball in "The Ballpark in Arlington".

The Story	*The Tuesday Update* announced that the Bluebonnet Nudist Park is holding an open house in recognition of National Nude Week. "Clothing is optional for females and children," the announcement read.**
News worthiness	**
The Spin	(1). CHILDREN? (2). Very, very few individuals are qualified to observe National Nude Week. (3). CHILDREN? (4). Does that mean that adult men have no option of putting their clothes on or no option of taking their clothes off? (5). CHILDREN? (6). Due to the poor attendance of the Decatur School Board at the open house of the Civic Center, they should make amends by visiting the Nudist Park. (7). CHILDREN? (8). Think you might want to visit? Before you go, picture everyone sitting around naked at, say, Mattie's. (9). Did that say CHILDREN?

See something in the local papers that struck you funny? Then suggest a topic for The Spin.

View Last week's issue.