A tongue in cheek review of the news published this week regarding Wise County.
Normally posted every Sunday around 10:00 p.m.
(Note: To make sure you are receiving the most recent update, hold down the "Shift" key while you click on reload/refresh).
For the week ending 06/01/02:

The Story A "smaller than expected crowd" of 150 showed up in Decatur at a Memorial Day ceremony at the Decatur Civic Center.
News worthiness  (on a scale of 0 to 5) **
The Spin Considering the attendees have a close connection to World War II, what do you think the attendance rate will be as the years continue to pass by?

The Story The fallout begins over the high appraisal rates recently sent out by the Wise County Appraisal District director Mickey Hand. Realtor Brenda Rankin writes a letter to the editor questioning the increase. "We are not buying into Mr. Hand's 'spin'."
News worthiness *
The Spin Hey, a little credit here.

The Story The Decatur Girls Softball team loses in its bid to seek a state title.
News worthiness **
The Spin Since the sport doesn't involve a pigskin, you might have missed this: The opposing pitcher Splendora's Melissa Collins, struck out 27 Lady Eagles over 12 innings. To quote Harry Carey, "Holy, cow". 

The Story It looks like Phil Ryan, our long time county sheriff, it headed east to Denton to accept a $74,000 a year job as "homeland security coordinator for Denton County". 
News worthiness ***
The Spin Two observations: (1) You think back room politics in Wise County is running amuck to fill the vacancy? and (2) Denton County government must have a heck of a lot of money to spend. 

The Story Decatur county square merchants are upset that courthouse employees refuse to park in remote lots instead of on the square. Further anger is caused by the fact that most of the tickets for violating the two hour parking limit are ignored. Main Street Director Frieda Davis is asking for input on how to solve this perpetual problem.
News worthiness *
The Spin Here's our suggestion: Claim that you spot an empty beer can in the back of one of the illegally parked vehicles and place a call to Mother's Against Drunk Driving who will immediately convince themselves and the legislature that the problem in Decatur is "alcohol related". With these wheels in motion, the parking violation will become a felony offense after a new bill is passed in the next legislative session. Throw in the extra benefit of a press conference on the courthouse lawn where everyone mugs for the camera, and its a no-brainer. 

Special Highly Technical Research Project to be Conducted Throughout 2002: 
 
 New This Week
Year To Date
Number of new births announced in the Wise County Messenger
7
218
Number of new births announced by parents with different surnames (or no father identified): 
3 (43%) 
72 (33%)


See something in the local papers that struck you funny?  Then suggest a topic for The Spin.

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